Send Me Home

Kapital 142 begins with the words “Maskil L’Dovid B’Hiyaso B’Maarah Teffilah”, an introduction that provides immediate context. As Rashi explains, Dovid Hamelech wrote these words as he found himself in the same cave as Shaul in Tzur HaYaelim. Is is clear from the Pessukim in Sefer Shmuel which tell this story that this was a fraught moment: Dovid faced certain death if he was discovered by Shaul, and at the same time he had to decide whether to attack his enemy first. We know that ultimately Dovid chose to spare the life of Shaul—although he cut the Beged of Shaul as a sign of his mercy—but it seems that in the moment Dovid did what he knew best: he turned to Teffilah.

The Pessukim of the Kapital reflect the urgency of the situation: “Koli El Hahsem Ezak Koli El Hashem Eschanan”. Dovid cries to Hashem, for he knows that his Yeshua has but one source, “Eshpoch Lifanav Sichi Tzarasi Lefanav Aggid”. Indeed, the desperation is palpable as Dovid cries: “B’Hisatef Alai Ruchi V’Attah Yadata Nisivasi B’Orach Zu Ahalech Tamu Pach Li”. As Rashi explains, only HKBH really understands the straits in which Dovid finds himself and how many snares lie in his path.

The Kapital is short but includes two elements that are also found in other Perakim of this nature. First, Dovid makes it clear that he does not expect to be saved on his own account: “Hakshiva El Rinasi Ki Dalasi Meod,”.” He also explains why he should be Zoche to this Yeshua nonetheless: “Hotzia Mimasger Nafshi L’Hodos Es Shimecha Bi Yachtiru Tzaikim Ki Tigmol Alai.” If he is saved, Dovid will sing the praises of HKBH, bringing Ribuy Kvod Shamyim.

Taking into account its plaintive nature and emotional tone, it is no surprise that this Kapital is one that we turn to in difficult or trying times, giving voice to the timeless words of Dovid Hamelech. In doing so, we feel that our moments of “Habet Yamin U’Reh Ki Ain Li Makir” are connected back to the Ma’arah in Tzur HaYaelim, a notion that itself gives us Chizuk. It seems from Chazal, however, that we may be echoing words that were spoken well before then as well.

The Passuk in the middle of this Kapital says: “Za’akti Elecha Hashem Amarti Attah Machsi Chelki B’Eretz HaChaim.” These words can easily be understood in the context of the greater Passuk: Dovid calls to Hashem, who he sees as his only protection, asking that he be saved from Shaul so that he may take his place among the living.

The Medrash Rabba in this week’s Parsha, however, tells us that when Yaakov Avinu wished to leave Bais Lavan he cried out to Hashem, “Za’aktei Elecha Hashem”, and asked to return to Eretz Yisroel, “Chelki B’Eretz HaChaim”. The Medrash continues, explaining that Eretz Yisroel is referred to as “Eretz Hachaim” because it is “Eretz SheMeiseha Chayim Techila L’Yemos HaMoshiach”.

We learn from this Medrash that the words used by Dovid Hamelech in the Ma’arah were first said by Yaakov Avinu himself, which perhaps adds great meaning to the Passuk in Tehillim, but we must understand the Medrash in its own right.

Why did Yaakov cry out to Hashem about returning to Eretz Yisroel? The Medrash later tells us that HKBH responded to these cries by telling Yaakov that his mother, father and HKBH Himself, awaited his return, which seems to indicate that there was no reason for Yaakov to stay in Bais Lavan—why then did he have to cry out, as indicated by the words “Za’aktei Elecha Hashem”?

This question is compounded by the way the Pessukim here tell the story: the Torah says that Yaakov noticed a change in Lavan, “VaYaar Yakov Es Pinei Lavan V’Hinei Eneinou Imo K’Tmol Shilshom”, and then Hashem told Yaakov to return to Eretz Avosav. There is no hint of an exchange between Yaakov and HKBH, rather the Torah seems to tell us that the directive to leave Bais Lavan came from Hashem without a request by Yaakov Avinu—what caused the Medrash make this apparent addition to the story?

Lastly, why does Yaakov refer to Eretz Yisroel as “Eretz HaChaim” here? What is the connection between his request to return to Eretz Yisroel and the fact that those who are Zoche to Kevura in Eretz Yisroel will be the first to experience Techiyas Hamesim, “Eretz SheMeiseha Chayim Techila L’Yemos HaMoshiach”? Why does Yaakov make reference to this aspect of Eretz Yisroel here, when asking to be able to leave Bais Lavan and return to Eretz Avosav?

In an effort to try and understand this Medrash, and what Yaakov meant when he said “Za’akti Elecha Hashem Amarti Attah Machsi Chelki B’Eretz HaChaim”, it may be helpful to see the way this exchange is brought down in a different Medrash

The Tanchuma HaYashan on this Passuk, quotes the words “Za’akti Elecha Hashem Amarti Attah Machsi”, and tells us that Yaakov wished to return to Eretz Yisroel but he felt that since he had Reshus to leave Eretz Yisroel, as the Passuk earlier in the Parsha tells us, he required Reshus to return as well. At that point HKBH said to him: “Reshus Attah Mevakesh HaReshus B’Yadcha.” Yaakov did not need to ask Reshus to return to Eretz Yisroel, because “Klum Ba’asa Ela B’Shvil HaShevatim Harei Hem B’Yadecha”. Yaakov had only come to Bais Lavan for the purposes of the Shevatim, and that need had been fulfilled, so he could now return to Eretz Avosav.

The Tanchuma is only slightly different from the Medrash Rabba, but adds one crucial detail: “Klum Ba’asa Ela B’Shvil HaShevatim Harei Hem B’Yadecha”. What does this mean? Why did Yaakov have to come to Bais Lavan for the Shevatim? Why was it important that the Shivtei Kah, save Binyomin, be born in Chutz L’Aretz? In addition, the Medrash here does mention the Drasha of “Eretz SheMeiseha Chayim Techila…”, but alludes to the fact that Yaakov’s request to return to Eretz Yisroel was couched in the words “Chelki B’Eretz HaChaim”. The question, therefore, remains: according to the Tanchuma, why did Yaakov refer to Eretz Yisroel in this way?

To better understand these Medrashim and their message, we can perhaps look to the way Yaakov speaks about his departure when confronted by Lavan.

After Lavan conducts a thorough search for his missing Teraphim, Yaakov becomes angry and speaks to his father-in-law very frankly about the experience of the past twenty years. After discussing the ways in which he has tried to deal fairly with Lavan, Yaakov concludes: “Es Anyi V’Es Yageah Kapai Ra’ah Elokim V’Yochach Emesh”.

The Medrash Rabba, on these words, teaches: “Chavivah HaMelacha Yoser M’Zechus Avos”, hard work is more beloved to Hashem than Zechus Avos. As proof to this statement the Medrash notes that Yaakov attributes the fact that he is leaving Bais Lavan with great riches to his forefathers, “Lulei Elokei Avi Avrohom…”, but the fact that he leaves with his family intact to his hard work, “Es Anyi V’Es Yageah Kapai Ra’ah Elokim V’Yochach Emesh”. We see, concludes the Medrash, that Zechus Avos can save material wealth, but hard work saves lives.

This Medrash obviously requires some explanation: why, indeed, is Melacha more beloved by HKBH than Zechus Avos? In addition, why did Yaakov Avinu hint at this concept in his words to Lavan? What benefit is there to Lavan understanding, or even being aware of, this truth?

R’ Shlomo Kluger, in Chachmas HaTorah, explains this Medrash by reframing the purpose of the years that Yaakov spent in Bais Lavan.

The reality, explains R’ Shlomo, is that every person’s time on this world is limited: most people pass on because of their Aveiros, but even if someone is free of Chet, he cannot live forever because of the Chet of Adam and Chava. Chazal tell us that at the time of the Chet, a certain amount of Zuhama was passed from the Nachash into Chava, and that little bit of Zuhama persists in us all, causing Misa even to those that are free of Chet. These fortunate individuals, we are told, are “Mes M’Koach Ityov Shel Nachash”.

There is one exception to this rule, however, as R’ Shlomo explains. Shibud, hard labor under duress, can eliminate the effects of the Zuhama left by the Nachash. Therefore, if one undergoes Shibud, and is completely free of Chet, he will not be subject to Misa. This, concludes R’ Shlomo, is the meaning of the words “Chavivah HaMelacha Yoser M’Zechus Avos”: because the Melacha of Shibud has the ability to counteract the Zuhama of the Nachash and forestall Misah, it is Matzil Nefashos and is, therefore, more powerful than Zechus Avos.

This idea helps us understand what Chazal mean by the words “Yaakov Avinu Lo Mes”. The Limud HaTorah of Yaakov, explains R’ Shlomo, caused him to be free of Chet, and the Shibud of Bais Lavan eliminated the Zuhma of the Nachash. Yaakov Avinu, therefore, did not experience the Misa that everyone else does: “Yaakov Avinu Lo Mes’.

R' Shlomo further explains that HKBH wanted Klal Yisroel to be immune from the Malach HaMaves, but even the elimination of Chet that Mattan Torah brought could not have this effect, as they would still be ‘Mes M’Koach Ityov Shel Nachash”. It was for this reason that Shibud Mitzrayim preceded Mattan Torah: it was the Shibud that removed the Zuhama of the Nachash, and therefore allowed Mattan Torah to have its desired effect.

Understanding this concept, and especially the connection between the Shibud of Yaakov Avinu in Bais Alvan and Shibud Mitzrayim, we can explain the Medrashim and Pessukim.

The Medrash Rabba tells us that Yaakov cried out, “Za’akti Elecha Hashem Amarti Attah Machsi” and that Hashem then told him “Shuv El Eretz Avosecha”, but the Passuk precedes that Tzivuy with the wordds “VaYaar Yakov Es Pinei Lavan V’Hinei Eneinou Imo K’Tmol Shilshom”. If we think about these Pessukim in the context of Shibud Mitzrayim, however, they are understandable.

We know that Bnei Yisroel cried out to Hashem throughout the Shibud, and that it was these Teffilos that were the eventual cause of the Geulah—it was not immediate, however. Only once the Shibud had its intended effect could the Geulah arrive, and then it came B’Chipazon, in a sudden manner.

Yaakov Avinu underwent his own Shibud, and constantly cried out to Hashem, “Za’akti Elecha Hashem Amarti Attah Machsi”, he wished to escape the Bais Lavan and return to the home of his father, but he knew he could not do so until the proper time arrived. Then, at one point, he realized that Lavan's attitude had changed, “V’Hinei Eneinou Imo K’Tmol Shilshom,” and he understood that the time had come for him to depart. It was then that time that he received the Tzivuy: “Shuv El Eretz Avosecha”.

Based on these ideas, we can also explain two other lines found in the Medrashim.

Yaakov Avinu understood that the ultimate purpose of his Shibud was to remove the Zuhama of the Nachash, allowing his lack of Aveiros to prove him immune to the Malach HaMaves. He, therefore, asked to return to the Eretz HaChaim, hinting at the concept of “Eretz SheMeiseha Chayim Techila…” Techias HaMaysim will usher in the end of Misa as we know it, a process that will begin in Eretz Yisroel. Yaakov, therefore, asked to return to Eretz Yisroel because he hoped to have reached a status free of Misa, akin to those who will be “Chayim Techila”.

This can also help us understand why HKBH told Yaakov that the time had come to return to Eretz Yisroel because “Klum Ba’asa Ela B’Shvil HaShevatim”. Of course the birth of the Shivtei Kah had come in Bais LAvan, but maybe Hashem was hinting to the future as well: the Shibud of Yaakov in Bais Lavan was an example for all generations, treaching us the true purpose of Shibud and Galus. For all eternity we can look at this Parsha and understand that the harshest Shibud serves only to bring us to a level of Adam HaRishon Kodem HaChet, free of the Zuhuamas HaNachash, ready to exist without Misa. When this process was complete, when its lessons could be passed onto the Shevatim and their offspring, Yaakov was ready to return to Eretz Yisroel.

We can now understand why these words are included in this Kapital.

In our darkest hours, when we truly feel “Avad Manos Mimeni Ain Doresh L’Nafshi”, we must remember that HKBH puts us in Shibud only to allow us to eventually reach the greatest heights, to bring us to the moment of “Chelki B’Eretz HaChaim”. iIt is then that we will join in fulfilling the promise of Dovid Hamlech: “L’Hodos Es Shimecha Bi Yachtiru Tzaikim Ki Tigmol Alai”.